Hey everybody. Not sure if this is the right subreddit for this but here goes:
I’ve been at this one engineering company since I graduated earlier this year. I was an intern for a couple of months and then was made an official employee. So I’ve been here for about 5 months now. When I was made an official employee and I had negotiations with my foreman about this, my salary was also raised. He also mentioned about another raise later this fall ”after we get to know each other more”, which already happened. So a lot has happened in a short amount of time. The company I work for is pretty big with dozens of offices and they’re doing good!
So it’s been going nicely. However, there are some days when there is really nothing to do. We have weekly meetings where we go through everyone’s workload and I usually say that if there’s something I could help with, you can hit me up. Some days are more fruitful with work and I have something to do that actually serves a purpose.
The culture is very relaxed, no one’s really breathing down on me, I also have a mentor who can help me if my foreman is busy. So it sounds nice, and it is, but the days when there is no work to do feel a bit painful. I usually listen to podcasts or read news on these days, or scroll through my past works to see if there’s anything I could improve on.
Part of the issue is that sometimes my mentor’s workload is so big that he can’t assist or check after my work constantly, so there is off-time there. My foreman is also unavailable most of the times, except on fridays, which is when we keep team meetings and go through everyone’s workflow on the team.
Another factor that adds to this is that because I’m essentially a junior, I don’t know everything, so I can’t really contribute to some tasks that require more knowledge. Most of the times it’s just doing the more rudimentary tasks out of the way for my mentor.
My understanding is that my team is aware that I may not have work to do 247, but still, I can’t shake off the feeling that my position might be in danger because of the days when i don’t have much to work with. It feels absurd, when you consider that I’m also on a monthly fixed payroll, sometimes I feel like I get paid for going to the toilet, reading news or listening to podcasts! It makes me question what I’m getting paid for and if my employment here was a mistake for the company.
So it’s a little bit unnerving like this. On the other hand, my foreman has specifically said that they want long-term contracts and I have received praise for my efforts. Regardless of this, I still get massive imposter syndrome, like I’m not doing enough or that I’m just idling without bringing too much value.
The company also has the possibility of doing remote, but I have gone to the office everyday regardless, because I only have a 15 minute travel time to work.
I know this might sound vague, but what could I do to alleviate these kinds of feelings when there are more quiet days at the office?