I’ve (29F) wanted to work in the a certain industry since I was a freshman in college 10 years ago, but it’s very difficult to get into. I even majored in it in grad school, but I graduated in 2020, so I couldn’t find work in that field at the time. Since then, I’ve worked in other industries that are of no interested to me, including the job I have now. The company I work for now is very outdated in their practices, but I love my manager. It’s not an exciting industry, but it’s safe and easy enough.
I saw a job opening in the industry in my field last month. I had met the hiring manager at a random event 4 years prior where I introduced myself and told her I wanted to work at her company. We connected on LinkedIn and a job opened about 6 months after we met she told me about and I applied to, but never heard back. When I saw the opening last month, I remembered her. I told her I applied and 9 days later, I actually got an interview with HR. The next day, he called me to schedule one with the hiring manager. 9 days after that, HR emailed me to schedule a panel interview in person. I was beyond nervous. In the moment, I felt like I did a good job, but it’s been 2 weeks now and I’ve heard nothing meaning I didn’t get it.
I’m SO embarrassed that I didn’t do a better job considering the hiring manager was giving me an opportunity. Clearly the panel didn’t like me and I’m devastated because this was my dream job. I’m not even applying anywhere else right now. I only applied to this one because it’s my dream job, but I can stay where I am longer for now. I just am having a hard time sitting with this. The rejection feels so personal since it was an in-person panel. Any advice?